This Is Why We Love It

Ask any server what they like the most about their job and almost all will respond with the same answer: the people they work with. Working in a restaurant, one is instantly connected with people from all walks of life. Serving is often an interim job for many, bringing in people of every age and at every stage of their lives. Currently I work with teachers, students, musicians, evangelists, veterans, immigrants, entrepreneurs, a graphic designer, an artist, a clothing designer, a published author, a radio show host, fathers, mothers ( I fall into the latter category.) The restaurant industry is a melting pot to say the least. But there is something we have that most work places are lacking: a bond like no other. Life long friends are made at these interim jobs. My best friend of five years is an old colleague from a serving job and although we have not worked together in over four years we still speak to each other on a daily basis. I met husband in while working in a restaurant and although our marriage didn’t survive, our friendship did. I am unable to speak to the mechanics of this bond. I am not sure that any of us could explain it. But I can attest to the fact that we would all agree that we have made some of the best friends of our lives through our restaurant jobs. Perhaps the camaraderie is built during the busy shifts when it seems like we go through hell together and all make it out alive making sure to leave no man behind. Perhaps it is in the off the clock when we really get to know one another during the after hours fellowship that often takes place. Whatever it may be, I think all servers are grateful for the friends we make throughout our service careers and most as I said will testify that this is why we love what we do.

P.S. David Grant, we will miss you. But we always have Facebook. ;o)

It's All Part of the Show

I’ve come to a conclusion in the dining establishment that currently employs me;  the general population has grown unaccustomed to superior service.  Where I work we experience a higher than typical volume.  Simply put, we are busy…all the time!  In order for us to be able to provide superior service to our competition we must utilize a unique style of teamwork.  At our restaurant it is typical that the person who initially greets a guest at their table is not the head server for that table.  I understand this causing confusion for our guests because that is not typical at any other restaurant.  But as I previously mentioned we have higher expectations for our service.  Correction, we demand it.  It is expected that all patrons be greeted and offered a beverage and appetizer within 45 seconds of being seated at their table.  The only way to execute this is through our teamwork system.  Greeting a table is the first priority of every server in the restaurant and whoever is able and the closest will generally be the one to do so.  At other restaurants a patron will most likely wait while their server finishes taking an order at another table, rings in an order, or more often doesn’t even realize they have a new table because they are in the kitchen.  So there is no question that the teamwork system is superior to the one man circus acts that most establishments employ. Often at our restaurant a guest will have several different servers taking part in their dining experience as greets are only one of the areas in which we exercise teamwork.  One may take a drink and appetizer order while another, still not the actual server, will deliver entrees and offer to bring anything else necessary for the meal, one more will probably bring refills while another could possibly remove plates from the table and yet another will probably take a credit card from the table and still another may return it.  Keep in mind that much of these actions especially refills being sent by a coworker are still orchestrated by that tables server.  At work, we are trained to focus on the restaurant as a whole so that all of these tasks will be completed in a timely manner.  While it is meant to impress we still have some patrons that are confused by this superior style of service and make complaints that everyone else is doing the job of their server.  I have walked up to tables to introduce myself as their sever after one of my colleagues has taken a drink order and her and another have returned with their drinks only to hear them demand an explanation as to why I am the third member of the staff to approach their table if I am their server.  We have had some people not leave tips complaining that although their dining experience was not lacking anything, there were so many people involved they could not tell who their actual server was.  Now these cases are the exceptions but it is more common that people are simply baffled by our teamwork system.  So of my readers I ask a favor.  The next time you hear some one complaining because their needs were accommodated by more than one person, bop them in the forehead like they do on the V8 commercials and explain to them what superior service looks like. 

Restaurant Rip Off

Restaurant Rip Off 

There are those that will come into a restaurant with what seems like a determination to “beat the house” so to speak .   To find a loop hole and yank on it knowing the restaurant will bend, there by giving the guest what they want.  It would be rude to tell a person they are cheap so we simply won’t do it.   Instead, we give in and let demands run about in dining establishments.   In this business, it’s certainly not true that the customer is always right, on the contrary, they are almost always wrong but the customer can almost always get what they want.  And they have figured that out.  Some pull simple rip offs like letting their teenagers order  off the kids menu knowing they are well past the age of twelve.  Few take a more brazen approach and ask their server blatantly to slip them something extra on the side for an extra tip.  This happened the other night with one of my coworkers.  A man had ordered gourmet cheese dip for he and his family.   After finishing he slyly asked my coworker if he could bring him another one on the slide.  He told my friend that it would help his tip if he could make it happen.  The cost of the dip is $9 so we can assume that if Mr. Cheese Dip didn’t want to pay the $9 for the dip, then he wasn’t going to give my server even $9 extra on a 20% tip to risk unemployment to get him a free cheese dip.  The rest of the dinner went off without  a hitch until the end of the service when my friend was cleaning his table and realized what Mr. Cheese Dip left him and why.  The tip was $15 on a $175 check.  On the bottom he signed his new nickname “Cheese Dip” letting my friend know that the reason for his poor tipping percentage.  Only because my friend would not give him a free cheese dip.  Twenty percent of a $175 check is $35.  Mr.  Cheese Dip left $20 less than that only leaving a little less than 9% of the check total.  If you have read my previous posts then you know we pay a 3% tip share.  It is 3% of total sales not tips so my friend had to pay $5.25 back to the restaurant for this table.  So he kept less than $9 on a table that should have been much more profitable for him had Mr. Cheese Dip not had such a unflattering sense of entitlement for his name sake.   Another one of my friends came up to me the other day with tears of frustration from a table that was playing the “loop hole” game at her table.  Here’s the set up.  It’s a man, woman and teen.  The couple says that they are going to order a “soup and salad” combo and split it.  She having the salad and he the soup.  This cost $11.  If they had ordered it separately then his soup would be $5 and her salad $9 totaling $14.  This couple found a $3 loop hole and they took advantage of it.  They also ordered a “child cheeseburger” for a girl that was at least 15 years old.   While a child cheeseburger is only $5 compared to $10 it is exactly the same size as the $10 burger.  It is only sold at a discounted price on the children’s menu for those 12 and under.  When the bill was brought the lady complained about her teenagers drink being itemized as soft drinks were free with items off the children’s menu.  Anther $2.50.  This lady found anther $2.50 loop hole to shave down the price of her bill.  By exploiting a restaurants weak spots, she was able to save $10.50 off her bill.  But what she also did was whittle another $2.10 off of the tip by bringing her check average down.  Ordering all of this directly to the woman that she was pick pocketing that extra $2.10 from,  there by earning her nick name “Polly Pick Pocket.”  There are other Polly Pick Pocket’s in this world.  One of my coworkers told me about a friend she has whose intentions are to get her entire meal paid for every time she goes out  to eat simply by complaining.  These rip off artists have found a way to skim off the top when they go out to eat.  But it doesn’t make them savvy, it only makes them cheap.  The moral of the story, don’t grow up to be like Mr. Cheese Dip or Polly Pick Pocket.  If you already are one, it’s time to make a change. 

Be Nice to Your Server

With this next post I would like to let everyone in on what seems to be a little known fact.  It’s pretty profound.  Ready?  Server’s are people, too.  It’s okay to treat them with the same courtesy that one  would extend to a friend.  Truth be known, a guest who is polite to a server will probably get better service.  Crazy concept, I know but true none the less.  I would say (and my colleagues would agree)  that about half of the tables that I greet have a dialogue that goes something like this.  The comments that stay in my head I will put in parenthesis.  

Me:  “Hello, how are you doing today?” 

Guest:  “Fine.”

Me:  “That’s wonderful.” (I’m fine also, thank you for asking.)

And even some go like this: 

Me:  “Hello, how are you doing today?”

Guest:  “Water.” 

Me:  There is no response from me here, I’ve already left to go get the water.  Obviously to this guest, each syllable is a waste of breath. But as I walk away I can’t help but think (How does one have a “water” day?)

Some guests will continue their conversation when I approach the table and not even acknowledge my presence.  I will never interrupt a conversation between guests because it is rude.  It is obvious that I am not a part of their party or conversation so my mere presence should be cue enough that I have a purpose for being there.  It is  completely understandable that a guest should be able to finish a point they were making and then turn attention to the server but when there is a stopping point and that opportunity is not taken to acknowledge the server, most of us will kindly step away from the table and come back to get a drink order at a time that is more convenient for the guest.  Some servers will choose to teach a lesson in manners this way.  My approach is quite the opposite.  I opt to “kill them with kindness.” After all it is obvious that they missed out on their lesson in manners.  Or they have mistaken my job title which is server for a similar one but one that is completely wrong;  servant.  Either way I use what little time I have to drop as many manner “hints” as I can at the table hoping that maybe they will take even a small part of that with them.   

Servers are not only ignored at the greeting of a guest but all throughout the service.  Today for example I had a lady that had over half of her entrée left on her plate but was clearly done eating for the time being.  While reaching for the plate I informed her that I would be happy to box the rest of her food for her.  Immediately after the words left my mouth she spun toward me and snapped, “I want a box for that” as if I were trying to steal her food right from under her nose.  My response, “Certainly.” (Really lady? I just said that three inches away from your ear.)  Also I can’t even count how many times I have been describing our specials for the day which ends with the daily vegetable only to be asked immediately after, “And what is your daily vegetable?”  As if I have forgotten to mention it.  (Really?  Those were the last words that just came out of my mouth.)  On occasion when I walk by my table to ask if my guests entrées are prepared to their liking I get no response at all as if I had just asked to question to a brick wall.  If the average guest sits at my table for an hour then I would say I am probably only physically at the table for five to seven minutes.  Is it too much to ask of a guest for five minutes of focused and courteous attention in the span of an hour?  Apparently so to some people.  I hope with this post that people will pay more attention to their servers but more importantly to simply be kind.  I’m not asking too much.  I don’t want to be buddies.  I only want my position as part of the human race warrants me:  common courtesy.  It’s as simple as that. 

The Business Meeting

Lately I’ve seen an astounding number of business meetings in my work place.  I’ve mentioned before the campers that come in and make their sales pitch to a client over lunch.  I will admit that the establishment that I work in makes for an inviting and professional atmosphere.  It is a place that I would take clients to for lunch if I needed to do so.  But lately it seems that people are completely abandoning their office or board room for a meeting place and taking over what I consider to be my office.  I have three different examples from this week alone.  The first lady came in twice in one day.  First she sat in my section with one gentlemen.  The ate lunch and I wouldn’t have been able to distinguish them from any other lunch outing until I cleared their plates and then they spread out the paper work on the table to discuss some lucrative topic.  An hour after they left my table, I saw the same lady come in with another client.  This time she wasn’t seated in my section but I noticed when I walked by her table that she wasn’t eating this time around.  She only ordered a San Pellegrino.  The next day I was eager as I saw my round table being set up for a party of six.  In the eyes of a server, that’s a good way to start the day.  Think about the potential earnings on a party of six.  My restaurant averages sales of about $16 per person at lunch.  So a six top should produce a check of about $96 before tax.  My restaurant has a policy that an 18% gratuity be automatically added to all parties of six or more.  That would make my average gratuity for a six top around $17.  This is how a server thinks, in earnings potential.  This is how I pay my rent, buy my groceries, etcetera, etcetera.  So back to this six top, my eagerness quickly dissipated as I offered the table an appetizer to begin their meal and they informed me that they would not be eating, that they were there to have a meeting.  I’m sorry but are we not in the business of serving food?  I am certain that we are not in the business of leasing office space.  Especially not without a charge.  I suppose these gentlemen thought they earned their keep by ordering one $9 cheese dip and four iced teas between the six of them sitting there discussing important topics for over an hour and then leaving me a generous 15% on their check that only totaled $19.   That’s a $3 tip for those who are baffled without your tip guides (kudos to those of you that carry one.)  That’s a far cry from the $17 I could have made if these guys had been made aware that dining establishments are meant for just that, DINING!  And to make it worse, one of the guys had another business meeting immediately following and moved to another table with a new client.  Still he sat in that server’s section, making his pitch and ordered nothing.  Finally, there are the MLM ladies that come in every Wednesday.  These ladies usually reserve a separate private dining room that we have available.  It costs nothing to reserve this room and there is no minimum that you must spend like there are at some places.  You simply have to make sure it’s available and request it for a party.  These ladies will reserve this private room for a party of 16 and invite anyone and everyone to come to this meeting in the hopes that they will sign up in the down line of their direct selling campaign.  Every week this dining room is set up for a party of 16 and a separate server is assigned to this event.  That means this is their only table all day!  Generally with this group only about 6 will actually show up and out of that 6 not everyone orders food.  The gratuity on this party usually winds up being less than $10.  Can you believe that a server could end up only making $10 in tips all day?  Remember we only get paid $2.13 an hour so it’s not like I’m saying the $10 is extra.  Even with the $10 if that’s all the server makes for that day then they made less than the national minimum wage for a days work.  This week these ladies sat out in the main dining room.  The saleswomen arrived early to set up their displays in the middle of the table and to cue their power point slide show.  They sat at the table throughout the whole lunch shift.  And although the gratuity proved to be a little better than usual for the server she was still unable to turn the table and have the opportunity to make more money.  I couldn’t help but notice the irony that as these ladies are pitching “unlimited earnings potential” to their clients, they are directly diminishing their server’s earnings potential.  The idea that it’s okay to go take up a table at a restaurant and not order anything is absolutely asinine.  It makes about as much sense as me trying to walk into a sold out movie theater and tell them that I won’t me purchasing a ticket for my seat because I’m not actually going to watch the movie, I brought a book instead.  Whoever started the rumor that restaurant’s are the new meeting place, this one was for you.  

Menu Modifications

Menu item modifications have become common place at restaurants.  Some establishments allow side item substitutions while others may have a small charge for such a replacement.  I hate olives and request that they be left off of any item I order that contains them.  I believe that simple request such as these are completely reasonable and easily accomplished.  I am always happy to oblige with demands such as these because my extreme distaste for olives (and mushrooms for that matter) provide me with empathy when it comes to the issue of ingredients.  That said, there are some situations where ingredients are already premixed as in items like artichoke dips, macaroni and cheese, or coleslaw and are unable to be removed in their entirety.  But somewhere along the way the phrase “the customer is always right” became loosely translated to “I’m the customer and you have to give me whatever I want,” and it has carried with it an almost obnoxious sense of entitlement.  While omitting ingredients is a reasonable request adding items can be different.  Simple additions like a condiment or a dressing are one thing but I have seen many get down right gluttonous with their additions with items like extra cheese, bacon, avocado, barbecue sauce and sautéed mushrooms.  It should be expected for items like these to have an additional charge as these additions are not factored into the food cost of the menu item.  But what I find is outright ludicrous in behavior is ordering completely off the menu.  One time a guest seated at one of my coworkers tables requested shrimp cocktail as an appetizer when our place of employment offered nothing of the sort.  We did offer a fried shrimp platter that consisted of bite sized shrimp and two sides.  When my coworker informed his table that he could not facilitate the request his customer complained, “So much for pleasing the guest.” Now this guy thinks that we should be able to use these shrimp and whip up his request considering it seems we have the necessary ingredients: shrimp and cocktail sauce.  Obviously he doesn’t realize that pre-peeled frozen bite sized shrimp and a side of cocktail sauce does not a shrimp cocktail make.  Not only that but what he and most diners fail to recognize is that our entire ordering and ringing process is facilitated by computer.  On that computer we have buttons that directly correlate with the menu items and the prices reflected there.  I hit that button, that much of a charge is added to the bill and the name of said item is sent to a printer in the kitchen relaying to the cook what needs to be cooked.  There is no “shrimp cocktail” button on our computer.  What is there is a “fried shrimp” button that charges right under $20.  Now why would a guest want to pay $20 for an oversized and under satisfactory portion of a generic shrimp cocktail?  These computer systems also account for our inventory.  Therefore I can not ring up a $10 hamburger instead of the shrimp because then both the hamburger and the shrimp inventory counts would be off.  Another reason a server might not be able to fulfill a special request is because an item is simply not prepped.  This situation presents itself more often with diners that frequently visit a restaurant and know of certain entrees or side items that are sometimes featured off the menu and therefore should be available.  What those guest don’t realize is that the kitchens of restaurants function highly on preparation.  I’ll break that concept down a little.  Although lunch and dinner establishments typically don’t open until around 11a.m., the kitchen crew arrives at the wee hours in the morning to begin preparations on the days menu items.  As previously mentioned many items are premixed or partially precooked (items like pasta or some vegetables) in order to expedite kitchen to table service.  I’ll be more specific.  I once had a customer inquire about the availability of a lime chicken entrée that my restaurant used to offer more than three years before but was no longer on the menu.  When I told her that the kitchen was unable to prepare this dish she snapped, “Well you have chicken and you have lime.”  Now obviously seeing as how I was there five days a week to her one day a month I was well aware of the offering of ingredients at the chef’s disposal in my restaurant.  I had to politely educate this woman that the lime chicken was marinated in a tumbler in a white wine marinade for hours before it was cooked giving it its distinct flavor.  It was not something that could be recreated in a matter of minutes. Now some customers take the refusal of their special requests with understanding realizing that if we could do it we probably would but the majority of them pout like children acting as if you have just ruined their whole day by refusing them their special treatment.  Some treat me as if I take a personal satisfaction in denying them the impossible when really I could care less as I don‘t have to cook it regardless of what is ordered. To these spoiled crybabies, I say next time, get off your high horse and try ordering from the menu.  That’s what it’s there for.

Reason for Restaurant Etiquette

I wanted to expound a little bit on the purpose that this blog is intended to serve.  There are actually two.  The first is simply as the subtitle reads, it is intended to be therapeutic.  Servers have to put up with a lot of crap throughout their day.  If I have no outlet, I will hold negativity and probably spread it to those around me.  Ever been around me when I’m in a bad mood?  Then you already know.  It is also intended to be a ranting place for my coworkers both present and past, and really anyone working in the restaurant industry?  I hope you all begin to speak up because I want to know your thoughts on the subjects.  The second reason that I wanted to write this blog was to educate.  And who is my target audience?  The people who go out to eat and while they may have a grasp on proper dining etiquette haven’t any decorum when it comes to interacting with their server.  Your average server spends at least part of everyday on the bad side of one of many different social injustices ranging from being assumed an idiot, to being flat out ignored, and so on, I could name a million…therefore, the blog.  Now before I am written off as just being a Negative Nancy, I want to say that I enjoy my job.  Those guest mentioned before only make up about 25% of the people that I interact with at work.  The other 75%  are well mannered and polite, and of those, there are a select few that make my job incredible.  I have some people who when they come in always smile and greet me. Asking how I am doing and then inquiring about my children.  Over regular visits, some customers come to know my children by name, and I have even had some remember my birthday and bring in a birthday card to express their wishes for my happy day.  I have waited on celebrities, musicians (my all time favorite, Al Green at Bahama Breeze in Memphis), millionaires, billionaires, preachers, teachers, bleachers…I joke, but the point is, I never know who I’m going to meet each day when I go into work and that is one of the things I love the most about the restaurant industry.  My hope for  the guests that can put a grey cloud over my section for their visit is that they can simply be enlightened by simple information that is sometimes overlooked if one is not familiar with the inner workings of a restaurant.  Of course I know there will always be some people that are straight up A-holes and there is nothing I can do to prevent that, but I can hope that if anyone treats their server with a little more courtesy or respect  because of better understanding, then maybe a ripple from that drop of good karma will come back my way and reduce my A-hole ratio.